Gapers Block has ceased publication.

Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
 Thank you for your readership and contributions. 

TODAY

Monday, December 2

Gapers Block
Search

Gapers Block on Facebook Gapers Block on Flickr Gapers Block on Twitter The Gapers Block Tumblr


Fuel

Andrew / August 15, 2007 10:59 AM

Question suggested by Steven. Got one of your own? Send it to inbox@gapersblock.com

Clarke / August 15, 2007 11:09 AM

Getting out of bed. After that it's up for grabs.

Tobermory / August 15, 2007 11:10 AM

5am: alarm goes off
5:05: get out of bed, toss on workout clothes, brush teeth, walk over to the gym.
5:30-6:30: work out
6:45: let dog out and water plants. Let dog in and feed her.
7:00: shower/dress/make-up/make lunch
7:45: leave for work - listen to Bob Edwards on XM radio
8:30: arrive at work

On weekends I sleep in as late as I can.

mike / August 15, 2007 11:15 AM

Wake up at 6:31, shower, get dressed, etc., leave apartment at 7:10, catch southbound 11 bus, disembark at Hubbard, walk five blocks east at full pace to make every light, enter office, procure coffee and water, sit down at my computer, check Rearview photo.

skafiend / August 15, 2007 11:30 AM

Ignore alarm that goes off at 5.

Lie in bed until 7. Watch local morning news until then.

Get up and SSS (sh*t, shower, shave)

Walk to living room and make coffee (sometimes), turn on TV, catch national news on CNN, etc.

Turn on computer and check email, etc., f*ck around on internet.

If enough time, make an egg or two for breakfast.

Look out of window and across courtyard and into windows of people across the way. See if they're doing anything interesting. Hey, they leave their shades way the hell up.

Water dying plants to prolong their agony. Ignore their cries for mercy.

Stare at spiders hanging from outside of windows. Hope they don't crawl inside while I'm gone.

Grab phone, iPod and gym bag.

Try to remember to take garbage downstairs.

Peek out of keyhole to see if anyone is waiting by the elevator. Pray that fat weird guy who patted me on the stomach once isn't out there. If he is, wait until he goes down first.

Take elevator downstairs, walk out building to bus.

Doyle / August 15, 2007 11:35 AM

At 5:30am I do some basic stretches, then I clasp my hands, think as universally as I can, and say, "Peace and Wisdom to you." (meaning everyone out there)

On the ride to work, it's the Diane Rehm Show on satellite radio. No better interviewer out there, in my opinion.

jen / August 15, 2007 11:53 AM

are you guys really watering plants every morning? and they're not dead from over-watering? hmm....

7-ish alarm, shower, brush teeth, dress, get lunch together, put stuff in hair, leave house by 8. ride bike to el, get on train, arrive at work by 8:45.

soup / August 15, 2007 12:10 PM

It seems that my life is better when I have rituals. I've been aware that I have a morning routine, just never written it down.
7:00am press snooze twice;
7:14am turn on lamp and NPR, make exactly two cups of yummy wonderful coffee, feed Rocky the turtle, give attention to cats, look out the window and check the sky, check email, flickr;
8:00am pantagrapher posts
8:05am - 9:30am shower, dress, make bed, grab an apple, carry my pannier and bike downstairs and ride across the river to work.

and, yeah i only water my plants once a week, on saturdays, otherwise they would drown to death.

Baldeesh / August 15, 2007 12:10 PM

Hey jen - I have an orchid mounted on a slab of bark - I have to water that every morning. Everybody else - not so much. And I do live in a bit of a jungle.

Between 4 and 6 am, I'm awakened by my cat. He either stands in my doorway and howls, or if he's feelinlg bold, he sits in the middle of the room and howls. I shoo him away and go back to bed.

My alarm goes off at 6:30 and I curse myself every morning for not going to bed earlier.

I get out of bed to find the cat sound asleep on the ottoman, so I bug the hell out of him for a few minutes.

Then I make some coffee, and while it's brewing, I continue to bother the cat.

Then I hop on the computer, do about an hour's worth of work, then I make my lunch, get dressed, bug the cat, do my hair, etc. and leave for my other job at about 8:30.

Yawn! Is it morning already? / August 15, 2007 12:10 PM

Wake up at 6...

Shit, shower, masturbate in the shower (not unlike Kevin Spacey, this will most likely be the highlight of my day) and shave...

Dress; feed the dog; smoke a cigarette; check e-mail, the weather and internet news; walk the dog...

Wait for the bus...

Arrive at work at around 8:10 and wait for 3:30 to roll around.

Allan / August 15, 2007 12:26 PM

Wake up, the time varies. Today it was 10. If I feel the urge, I get up and go to the bathroom. If not, I don't bother getting off the couch and just stare at the ceiling while gently fondling my testicles. Eventually turn on the tv . As of late I have been watching PBS kids they have this show on called Arthur and it is hilarious.

taJ / August 15, 2007 12:28 PM

weekdays:
alarm at 7:37
snooze till past 8
pray
stumble around, feed kitteis, drink water, bathroom, look at myself in the mirror thinking-you need more sleep

weekends:
sleep in
pray/meditate
neti pot irrigation
tea
have some cereal or eggs for breakfast
in general not rushing!

skafiend / August 15, 2007 12:31 PM

To clarify: I don't water the plants every day. But I suspect they aren't doing as good as they could be doing. Bigger pots may be in order. Also, I had the bright idea of growing squash inside the house. Didn't dawn on me that the flowers need to be pollinated by bees to produce squash until too late. But I read somewhere that you can pollenate them yourself using a brush of some sort. Hasn't worked yet. So part of my morning now is spent staring at the squash plant and concluding I should have stuck with jalapeno peppers.

Baldeesh / August 15, 2007 12:38 PM

skafiend - I'm not sure if they can self-pollinate - you may need another squash plant and manually spread pollen from one to another.

The only edible plant I've grown indoors was Basil, and the damn thing tried to take over my living room.

Jill / August 15, 2007 12:38 PM

My morning routine includes sleeping through the alarm, having horrible NPR dreams because of that, and getting dressed/out of the house as fast as possble because by now I've overslept and I know that it'll take forever for me to get a 135 downtown.

Skafiend, get either a makeup brush or tiny paintbrush for pollination. The Boy and I have been trying to grow plants indoors too, which a gardener from the Chicago Botanic Gardens told us wouldn't work, but this year we've got a nice-sized green pepper!! On the other hand, our corn is looking pretty sad.

editorkid / August 15, 2007 12:39 PM

Wring every last minute of sleep I can. Why on earth are you people getting up early when there's quality sleep time to be had?

From there I wake up and robotically go through a routine that is so ingrained that, should it be disrupted, there's really no point in trying to get to work. As such, there's nothing interesting enough to share with complete strangers.

skafiend / August 15, 2007 12:48 PM

OHHHHH!!! So it won't work if you just pollenate one flower to another on the same plant, it has to be pollen from two completely different plants?... but I did plant three different seets in one windowbox and all three sprouted. Aren't those different plants? And I was using an old toothbrush to spread the pollen.

Besides, maybe I was trying to grow Applachaian squash, ever think of that???

Apologies for turning this into Plant World blog

carrie / August 15, 2007 12:55 PM

The most important thing- take my no babies allowed medicine. Then…

My alarm is set for between 735 and 745, hit snooze until about 805, no matter what. If I didn’t shower the night before, I shower. If I showered the night before, I lounge in bed, ask the cat why she won’t just go to work for me, lay back down. Alarm goes off again, I see what time it is, panic, tell the cat it’s time to make the donuts and get up. I get dressed, put on mascara, wonder why I can’t get back into my old routine of getting up early and going to the gym. Then I justify it by remembering that I used to wake up at 330 am to be to work at 430 and hey, I’ve paid my dues! Then I haul ass out the door, hoping for a bus. I curse the CTA when there is no bus in my direction, but 5 in the other direction. I dash to the train, wait, hope to get a seat and some days I’m real lucky and I do.

If I’m at my Boyfriend’s, I try to get up at 8 so I can hog the bathroom for a few minutes for mascara time. Then I get dressed and visit with his cat and tell her to quit attacking me and that it’s time for her to get a job. Then we leave, walk about 30 seconds to the train, hop on and go to work. I decided that I really like the 30 second walk.

Tada! A morning in the life of Carrie

kelly / August 15, 2007 1:17 PM

7:45 alarm
7:47 make coffe
7:50 shower
8:00 pour a cup of coffee
8:03 moisturize!
8:05 dry hair, straighten hair which takes up most my morning. Not kidding.
8:30 dress for work which means finding clean pair of jeans, t-shirt and flips flops + make another cup of coffee.
8:48 drive to work
9:03 arrive at work a few minutes late because I should have gotten up fifteen minutes earlier.

kcc / August 15, 2007 1:18 PM

cover the mirrors, put water near the door, eat neighbor's food, sit on ground, take off shoes...you know...the usual.

cliff @ rosedale / August 15, 2007 1:20 PM

0600: alarm goes off on the other side of the room. Lay there and listen to NPR for 30 minutes.

0630: Get up, stumble to the bathroom. Do the bathroom stuff (void, shower, shave, brush the fangs). Finish up by looking in the mirror and feeling alive for the first time today.

0715: Get dressed. Boxers, then socks and shoes. T-shirt, slacks and a button down if it's Wednesday and I'm going into the office. Otherwise it's shorts and a t-shirt w/ flipflops as I stroll into my home office.

0730: Online working if I'm at home, otherwise I'm headed out to the carpool for the weekly trip to St. Charles.

Jill / August 15, 2007 1:34 PM

Ditto apologies on Plant World.

The weird thing is that we also only have one plant, so I thought it wouldn't pollinate using the brush, but somehow the pepper showed up. Maybe an immaculate pollination? Or maybe another bug got in the window and helped us out. Either way, we're going to do the multiple plant thing.

I'd think a toothbrush would work too--the main idea is to be gentle.

Leelah / August 15, 2007 1:41 PM

Non-summer routine:
6.06 am- alarm sounds. hit snooze
6.15 am- snooze over, get up
6.15-6.25 - walk dogs
6.25 - 6.45 - feed dogs, shower
6.45- 6.55 - make tea, pack lunch
7 am - leave for work
7-7.30 - drive to school, do makeup in car
7.30-8 - arrive at school, get materials ready for the day, start work at 8

Summer routine
6.30 am- One dog begins her hour and a half long routine where she comes in and looks at me. Ignore dog. Shove her away if she sticks her nose in my face
8 am - check email, walk dogs
After that, it's up for grabs...

sara / August 15, 2007 1:45 PM

6:50 alarm. hit snooze
6:58 alarm. get up, let cats in the bedroom/bathroom area. pet and talk to cats while going to the bathroom and washing face. follow cats running to the kitchen. clean up inevitable cat poop from floor near litter box. feed cats and change their water.
7:05-ish change in to running clothes. stretch while petting cats, who have already mostly finished their food.
7:15-ish. set alarm for boyfriend for 7:20 and warn him that it will be going off soon. try to gauge whether his grunt was the result of an actual understanding of these circumstances or just an automatic response while sleeping.
7:18 leave for run, stopping to look at herbs growing on the porch on the way out. maybe pick off some basil flowers. (i heard i'm supposed to do that, and i don't know if it's right or not, but it makes my fingers smell nice and basily.) run around somewhere, often chicago river path, winnemac park prairie path, or montrose harbor. plus the parts that lead to those places.
7:50 come back from run, wipe dripping sweat from face with paper towels. get glass of very cold water. check to see whether boyfriend is in shower or sleeping while alarm goes off. (50-50 chance.) stretch in front of fan while drinking all the water. put away watch and shoes and write down info about run in log.
7:55-ish. wipe dripping sweat off face again. pour bowl of cereal and eat it sitting on the edge of the couch (to minimize sweat transfer) while reading something.
8:05-ish. take shower, get dressed, make lunch, scoop cats' litter box, brush teeth.
8:30 (ideally). leave apartment, get bike, ride to work.

Sam / August 15, 2007 2:55 PM

6:15 Hit snooze a few times
6:50 Turn off fan, close curtains, get in shower.
7:15 Eat breakfast in underwear
7:45 Moisturize, blow dry hair
7:55 Get dressed for work, put on makeup
8:00 Walk to Blue Line
8:15 Blue line to O'Hare, listen to NPR podcasts or read (currently Great Expectations)
8:50 Catch the PACE 230 Bus (or walk)

leah / August 15, 2007 3:13 PM

5:00 cats gently pat my face b/c HONGREH. Ignore.
5:10 & few times more they do this. Further ignoring.
6:45 alarm *snooze*

Roll out of bed somewhere around 7:50 & the race is on. I know I can get out of the house in 20 minutes if I really train hard.

7:50 shower
8:00 dry off
8:01 sit on towel on couch watching WGN while I put on lotion
8:06 get sucked into commercials
8:10 throw mascara on, clothes in my bag & run out the door to hope on bike to come to work

steven / August 15, 2007 3:19 PM

I'm glad I suggested it. Nice peek into other's lives.

5:00 wake up
5:15 get out of bed, sss, feed cats, open windows to let in crisp morning breeze
5:45-6:00 kiss wife goodbye, leave for work
6:00 hit the road (edens), listen to mike and mike or ipod or 780AM
6:30-6:45 make it to work
6:50 get coffee, fruit, cereal, muffin from cafe
7:00 eat and surf online for a few minutes, then on to work emails

and oh look it's3:19 time to go home

Mac / August 15, 2007 3:20 PM

Snooze button..repeat.
Finally wake up...groan..."still alive *sigh*..." look at clock...Aaaaaaaarrrrgh...rush through the aforementioned SSS...speed to work...the usual 15-20 minutes late.
Repeat 6 times a week.

Elizabeth / August 15, 2007 3:26 PM

7:00 alarm goes off
snooze. Tell parakeet to shut the eff up
7:09 alarm goes off
snooze. Tell parakeet to shut the eff up
7:18 alarm goes off
snooze. What parakeet?
7:27 alarm goes off
OH CRAP!
7:30-8:10 frantically scramble around the apartment. Shove breakfast in my mouth, brush teeth while packing gym bag, lord help me if I have to iron something too, throw makeup into bag as I'll have to do it on the train.
8:10-8:15
dote on kitties. Tell them to be good little girls today. Tell squalking parakeet to can it.
8:25 at the train station.
Please, oh please let me get a seat. And don't let giant man at next stop plop down on top of/next to me. Why am I pouring sweat already? What was the point of a shower? OH CRAP! I forgot to feed the cats. AGAIN! Oh well. They're getting tubby anyway.
9:15 Sheepishly walk into work 15 minutes late.

jen / August 15, 2007 3:46 PM

sara - yes, if you don't pick off the leaves, the plant is finished for the season. the blooms also start to make the leaves taste bitter.

i have a semi-jungle as well, but i aim for once a week; every other day for the basil, however.

i also neglected to mention "feed the fish" but really, that's only when i remember. i'm a bad mom.

re Elizabeth and sweating - YES. why am I the only one who appears very uncomfortable downstairs at the Logan Sq. el stop? how do the rest of you seem so serene and most importantly, NOT SWEATY?? screw you guys, you must be robots.

Mindy / August 15, 2007 4:05 PM

wake up at 4:56am. relieve bladder, brush teeth, get dressed, leave apt by 5:02. bike to work. punch in by 5:09.

roderick / August 15, 2007 4:07 PM

5:45 alarm, no snooze, lay in bed listening to NPR
5:48 eat special K bar and guzzle a powerade
5:55 digest while watching WGN, give jealous eye to sleeping cats
6:15 poop
6:25 put on running clothes
6:30 run
7:20 get back from running, guzzle about a quart of water
7:30 shower
7:40 get dressed
7:45 feed cats, tell one of them to get a job (what's up with all of the cat owners telling their cats to find work?!?)
7:50 brush teeth
7:55 throw together a lunch
8:05 leave for the brown line

Chicken's mom / August 15, 2007 4:14 PM

Heavy make-out session with dog: she rolls on her back, legs straight up in air. It's evocative of that famous Debra Winger photo from the 70's. Woof.

Dubya / August 15, 2007 5:11 PM

7:30 a.m. - His snooze button. Try to go back to having that great dream about the letter "Q"

7:45 - Complain when Laura tells me to get out of bed. Tell her I'm sick and to let someone else be leader of the free world today.

7:49 - Jump out of bed when Dick comes in and tells me to get up or else.

8:00 - Brush teeth, comb hair, do line

8:20 - Eat last of Fruity Pebbles for breakfast. Ask mom if I can have donut too. She says no.

8:45 - Go to bathroom and practice solemn look in mirror for daily Iraq death count

9:00 - Meet some guy from some country I never heard of. Try not to laugh when he says his name. It's funny.

9:45 - Sift through stack of latest resignations.

10:15 - Juice time!

11:30 - Meet with Joint Chiefs of Staff. Pretend I understand what they're talking about. I think they bought it!

12:00 - Lunch: Yay! Spaghetti-Oh's again!

1:35 - Prepare to send hurricane relief to people of Hawaii. Stop to try and figure out Kanye found out my feelings about black people.

2:27 - Read Bible. Black out the parts I don't agree with.

3:00 - Whew! what a day!

a / August 15, 2007 8:08 PM

Summer:
1. sleep until my man shakes me awake to drive him to the metra.
2. drive back home and do whatever.

School Year:
1. Dual alarms at 5:14 and 5:23 respectively. Snooze both of them twice, which gets me out of bed at 5:39.
2. Shower, dry hair, lotion, makeup.
3. Pack breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack. Make and start drinking coffee throughout.
4. Torture boyfriend who doesn't have to wake up for ANOTHER TWO HOURS.
5. Go to car.
6. Go back to house and get the breakfast, lunch, and snack i left on the counter.
7. Out of the house by 6:45 at the latest- drive to work, listen to news.
8. At school to punch in by 6:58. Check mailbox, put food in fridge, walk upstairs to classroom.
9. Open door, up lights, turn on computer, check email.
10. Start prepping handouts/lectures/activities.
11. Field morning student questions, which are many.
12. 7:45 music starts, which indicates beginning of
school day.

jj / August 16, 2007 12:02 AM

8:55am - turn off alarm, turn on CNN to see if anything horrible happened while i was asleep. switch to cltv weather during CNN commericals
9:05 - 9:30 - shower, get dressed, brush teeth, etc. scrunch hair so as to MAXIMIZE curliness (don't give in to the straight hair beauty industrial complex! fight the power! viva la curls!) in winter, blow dry hair so it doesn't freeze.
9:30 - make tea or iced tea, eat breakfast bar (maybe)
9:35/9:45 - leave for work, depending on bike/train/drive. if driving, listen to WLUW. if biking, contemplate the meaning of life and/or worry. if on train, first stop at food mart for special treat of vitamin water and lottery ticket, make silent promise to God to pay for dental work of food mart clerk if I win the lotto.

T / August 16, 2007 7:32 AM

First, I am roused from my slumber by eight romping and nuzzling furry puppies. Then, in my bed chamber I am dressed by my large entourage of syncophants, at that time I proceed to the Grand Hall where my Head Eunuch, John Edwards, ritually sacrifices the eight puppies in an old family recipe blood ritual, designed to insure my success. Then, as I leave my underground lair, in the dark of the night, I curse my nemesis/fake husbands signed photo as I pass it going out to the door. I then hop on my campaign broom and travel to my next fundraiser.

mark / August 16, 2007 8:31 AM

jesus lord you people wake up some damn early... 5 am to workout. god help me! well, or help you.

7:30 alarm goes off... begin calculations of how many times I can hit snooze and/or what my excuse for being late will be today.

7:40 hit snooze

7:50 hit snooze

8:00 hit snooze

8:10 hit snooze start to get worried b/c i'm sorta supposed to be at work at 8.

8:20 hit snooze; rationalize that i'll just stay 30 mins late ... besides, how long can coffee, shower and bagel take?

8;30 get out of bed, wracked by guilt.

8:50 well damn, the shower part took about 10 mins longer than i hoped.

9:00 dressed and ready to make coffee quilckly and a bagel

9:02 curse b/c i forgot to get more cream for coffee.

9:14 drive through Coffee Culture, race to work

9:22 get to work, mumble good morning; vow to do better tomorrow.

Sol / August 16, 2007 9:38 AM

7 a.m. Get weighed.
7:03 a.m. Return to bed in sulk over weight. Head-state bad. Sleeping or getting up equally out of question. Think about [insert random guy’s name here].
7:30 a.m. Hunger pangs force self out of bed. Make coffee, consider grapefruit. Toast poptart.
7:35-7:50 a.m. Look out of window.
7:55 a.m. Open wardrobe. Stare at clothes.
8 a.m. Select shirt. Try to find black Lycra miniskirt. Pull clothes out of bottom of wardrobe in quest for skirt. Go through drawers and search behind bedroom chair. Go through ironing basket. Go through dirty linen basket. Skirt has vanished. Have cigarette to cheer self up.
8:20 a.m. Dry skin brushing (anticellulite), bath and shampoo.
8:35 a.m. Begin selection of underwear. Laundry crisis means only available underpants are vast white cotton. Too unattractive to contemplate, even for work (psychological damage). Go back to ironing basket. Find unsuitably small black lacy pair – prickly but better than giant Mummy-pant horror.
8:45 a.m. Start on black opaque tights. Pair one seems to have shrunk – crotch is three inches above knees. Get second pair on and find hole on back of leg. Throw away. Suddenly remember had Lycra miniskirt on when returned home with [insert random guy’s name here] last time. Go to living room. Triumphantly locate skirt between cushions on sofa.
8:55 a.m. Return to tights. Pair three has hole only in toe. Put on. Hole transforms into run which will protrude tellingly from shoe. Go to ironing basket. Locate last pair of black opaque tights twisted into ropelike object speckled with bits of tissue. Untangle and purge of tissue.
9:05 a.m. Have got tights on now. Add skirt. Begin ironing shirt.
9:10 a.m. Suddenly realize hair is drying in weird shape. Search for hairbrush. Locate in handbag. Blow-dry hair. Will not go right. Spray with plant spray and blowdry some more.
9:40 a.m. Return to ironing and discover stubborn stain on front of shirt. All other possible shirts dirty. Panic about time. Try to wash out stain. Entire shirt now soaking wet. Iron dry.
9:55 a.m. V. late now. In despair, have cigarette and read email for calming five minutes.
10 a.m. Try to find handbag. Handbag has vanished. Decide to see if anything nice has come in the mail.
10:07 a.m. Bill only, about nonpayment of minimum payment. Try to remember what was looking for. Restart quest for handbag.
10:15 a.m. Beyond lateness now. Suddenly remember had handbag in bedroom when looking for hairbrush but cannot find. Eventually locate under clothes from wardrobe. Put on jacket. Prepare to leave house. Cannot find keys. Scour house in rage.
10:25 a.m. Find keys in handbag. Realize have forgotten hairbrush.
10:35 a.m. Leave house.

Give or take the tights, anyway.

staci / August 16, 2007 9:41 AM

Alarm goes off at 5:55 am, get up and go to couch to watch WGN news until 6:30ish. Shower, brush teeth, moisturize, dry hair and pull hair up in a clip to ensure hair does not immediately go flat. Feed guinea pig. Put on makeup and talk to guinea pig. Put on work clothes, grab lean cuisine and head out the door to catch the bus.

paul / August 16, 2007 11:26 AM

Sometimes I really do have to get up, but usually it goes like this:

7am-ish- roll over and check email and schedule with laptop. Determine if anything is due.

Go back to sleep.

9:30am- roll over and check email from all the poor slubs who had to get up, cram into a train and go to work.

11am-ish- make coffee

11:25 go on gapers block and write a comment

My 'morning' is really more around 3-4pm when I prepare for work to arrive downtown at 5, when everyone elese is rushing home.

G.P. / August 16, 2007 12:05 PM

7:30 am - Alarm goes off, hit snooze three times 'til 8:00 am and try to sleep despite crowding from wife and 1-2 cats on bed.
8:00 am - Get out of bed, take ghetto blaster off kitchen shelf and place on top of toilet seat. Select wake-up music for shower. Start coffee machine, begin CD.
8:03 am - shower.
8:30 am - Return ghetto blaster to kitchen. Pour coffee and light first of two cigarettes. Watch weather channel while swarmed by bored cats.
8:40 am - 8:44 am - Feel bowel movements commence from caffeine. Spend 10 minutes in bathroom with magazine and 2nd cigarette. Finish coffee.
9:00 am - Watch Jon Stewart while brushing teeth.
9:10 - Iron shirt and dress while still watching Jon Stewart.
9:20 - Carefully pack lunch and ironed work clothes into bike bag.
9:25 - Dress in bike gear & wardrobe.
9:30 - Bicycle west on Roscoe Ave.

emdub / August 16, 2007 1:02 PM

God- none of you have kids, right?

When you have a kid, that's the alarm. No snooze button included. It sucks.

If the garbage trucks are in the alley, the alarm goes MOMMMMMY! MAMA! MOMMMMY! at 5:30am. If not, we might get lucky with 6:30.

Lift kid out of crib. Sit on toilet with an audience of one who asks questions and for a hug. He does help with the toilet paper tho, hands it over and flushes too.

Sit on couch, get some milk for the boy, coffee for me. Watch us some Wonderpets. Go get dressed while boy plays with cars.

MOMMY I WENT POO POO!

he's holding his diaper out for me to admire. Spend 1/2 hour cleaning up poo.

Get husband to put clothes on child, since I've had enough. Leave the house with no more than 5 cars/trucks/helicopters. Drop off at daycare.* Whew*

Neal / August 16, 2007 1:19 PM

Lately, it's been like this:

9:45 - Alarm goes off. Contemplate how long I have before I REALLY have to wake up.
9:50 - Reset alarm.
11:45 - Alarm goes off again.
11:50 - Crawl out of bed and urinate as soon as humanly possible while my roommate walks by the bathroom and asks me how the poop is going.
11:51 - Brush teeth, shower, realize more paint is peeling off the tiles of our horribly old and decrepit bathroom.
12:00 - Moisturize. Worst part of my day. Damn you, dry skin!
12:05 - Get dressed, pack my bag.
12:15 - Leave for work and hop on the train at Rockwell in order to get there by 1.

Steve / August 16, 2007 2:05 PM

7 a.m. -- alarm goes off, and I hit snooze
Repeat snooze anywhere from once to ten times
7:09, 8:30 or some time in between -- get out of bed and take a leak
Then it's....
-- pour a cup of coffee
-- walk into home office
-- check email and surf web idly for 10-100 minutes
-- start work for the day

Sara / August 16, 2007 9:53 PM

On a day with a client meeting:

6:10 - Alarm and I get right up
6:11 - Use bathroom, remove nightguard (like a retainer, because I grind my teeth) and take birth control
6:15 - Shower
6:25 - Fill kettle from Brita pitcher
6:30 - Contacts, moisturizer, hair gel
6:35 - Choose clothes
6:45 - Fill bowl with cereal, add raisins or blueberries, take vitamin
6:50 - Eat while reading Time Out, Fast Company or Wired
7:00 - Make tea in travel mug
7:05 - Brush teeth for two minutes, deodorant, makeup, perfume, jewelry
7:10 - Grab cellphone, kiss sleeping boyfriend, boyfriend remains sleeping
7:11 - Pride myself on getting it all done in an hour. Drive. Listen to NPR, stress about traffic and the day ahead

On a day with no clients:

7:00 - Alarm and I rationalize another half hour
7:30 - Pee nightguard pill
7:35 - Glasses ponytail clothes
7:40 - Kettle cereal magazines
7:50 - Tea teeth deodorant
7:55 - Cellphone boyfriend kiss
8:00 - Pride myself on not taking it all too seriously. Drive. Listen to audiobook. Try to enjoy the scenery.

jasonb / August 17, 2007 7:01 AM

5:30 am - wake, get up, piss, stretch.

5:45 am: Head down to our building's exercise facility where I bench-press my body weight, and yours... about a million times. The Swedish Bikini team looks-on in amazement.

6:15 am: Take milk bath. Brush teeth.

6:35 am - Throw on my favorite suit & Rolex.

6:45 am - leave apt. Catch a cab, for what normally is a 15min walk to work.

6:50 am - arrive at work. Grab a coffee, bagel... and the cute new intern's phone number

7:15 am - Still in bed, just realizing the previously mentioned was all a dream

7:15:21 am - jump out of bed, shave & brush teeth... while in shower

7:24 am - run into bedroom, soaking wet and as naked as the day I was born. Throw on the first shirt and jeans I step on.

7:27 am - dart out the front door, Blackberry in hand, while simultaneously typing up a random excuse for my tardiness, that will accidentally be sent to the wrong manager.

7:37 am - arrive at work 37min late, sweaty from running, to find my manager at my desk, engaged in what appears to be a joyous conversation with a kiss-ass colleague of mine... whos just always on time.

7:40 - No lecture or punishment from my boss. Only the dreaded look of "disappointment".

It's amazing that I've lasted nearly a decade there.

printdude / August 17, 2007 8:19 AM

According to my wife this is my schedule (I am unaware until the second cup of coffee):
6:00 am - Dog Tip-taps trying to wake me up.
6:30 Alarm goes off, hit snooze.
6:38 Alarm goes off, listen to radio while sleeping still.
6:50 Wife gently prods me into rising (she has already done god knows what)
6:51 - Wander around the house, looking for coffee I haven;t made yet. Let dogs outside.
6:52 - Wander into office; check email, sports scores, gapersblock, headlines.
6:55 - Wander to bathroom, pee, shower, towel off, apply deodorant, shave, take meds, put on underwear.
7:00 - hunt for matching socks. dress. locate usual 20 items for pockets, place in pockets.
7:05 - leave house
7:05:30 - re-enter house, grabbing keys, cell phone or other forgotten item.
7:07 - drive to work
7:30 - arrive at work, grab coffee, start 6 computers, check emails.
7:45 - greet boss.
Work 'til morning is over

biblliogrrl / August 17, 2007 9:02 AM

610ish- alarm goes off first time.

I am the queen of Snooze Bar Olympics.

7ish I get up.

Coffeepot has been set up the night before. I stumble into the kitchen and start that. While the coffee is brewing I use the facilities and brush my teeth.

Coffee and yogurt in hand, I go back into the bedroom to check my email and surf around until about 745.

745- realize I have been slacking off and need to take a shower. Shoo the cat out of the bathroom (she gives me a baleful look).

805 - smoke a cigarette, pull on jeans, tanktop and pair of vans.

810 - back to the bathroom to throw my hair into a braid so I don't have an urge to cut it all off.

815 - make sure everything is in my bag for work. Phone? Smokes? Keys? everything else?
Have another cigarette and slack some more.

825 - Grab helmet and bag, head down to bike to ride to work.

GB store

Recently on Fuel

Urban Ethos [26]
What is Chicago's "urban ethos"?

Cool Glass of... [16]
What're you drinking?

Supreme Decision [22]
What's your reaction to the Supreme Court's decision on the Affordable Care Act?

Taking it to the Streets [20]
Chicago Street Fairs: Revolting or Awesome?

I Can Be Cruel [9]
Be real: what is the meanest thing you've ever done?

View the complete archive

GB Store

GB Buttons $1.50

GB T-Shirt $12

I ✶ Chi T-Shirts $15