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Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
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Sunday, May 19

Gapers Block

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Dragonslayer / February 22, 2007 5:26 AM

Not watching.

The only time I watch is when I'm dating a girl who makes me.

Jaye / February 22, 2007 6:09 AM


throwing a small party actually.

i predict that my party will be more fun than the actual broadcast. that there will be a bit of babel, some inconvenient truth along with a tad bit of little sunshine and even a dreamgirl or two.

skafiend / February 22, 2007 6:51 AM

Eh, I'll probably catch a little of it. One, because there's a bar I go to that has an Oscar Pool where you can win a few bucks and I've entered. And two, because I've been trying to write a supid screenplay for sometime now and at the end of the telecast I always vow to be sitting there next year, nominated for Best Screenplay.

Guess what? It hasn't happened yet. For real!

madachode / February 22, 2007 8:50 AM

I do not waste my life with those people, 1 they have enough award shows for themselves anyway 2 they do not sign my paychecks or contribute to my well being 3 they do nothing for society but take your time and money, your time would be better spent being with your family and friends rather

Erica / February 22, 2007 9:12 AM

Not planning on watching. I do think it would be rad if Jennifer Hudson won supporting actress, though. She's a Chicago gal, an American Idol reject, voluptuous, wholesome, and all about church and family.
She's an underdog-type that is not (so far) letting her head get too big.

kelly / February 22, 2007 9:29 AM

i'm laughing about the "only if I'm dating a girl who makes me." i am dating a new guy and he and i are watching it together. i thought it sounded like a fun date.

aeb / February 22, 2007 9:31 AM

I love the Oscars. The clothes. . . the stupid speeches. . .self-important actors. It's a guilty pleasure.

eep / February 22, 2007 9:41 AM

I won't be watching, as I'll be in Disney World watching the fireworks that night.

I'm not really all that interested this year, anyway. I always geek out more over the awards like costumes (Marie Antionette would get my vote) and art direction (hello, Pan's Labyrinth). But I'll be just fine not watching this year.

spook / February 22, 2007 9:48 AM

Good question, good question!
N. Y Times columnist Bob
Herberts said today “The nation may be at war, and Al Qaeda may be gearing up for a rematch. But that’s no fun, not when Britney is shaving off her hair and Jennifer Aniston is reported to have a new nose”

My prediction? Far more Americans care/ will be tuned into the Oscars than those who really care about what’s going on in Iraq and Afghanistan.


CC1st / February 22, 2007 9:49 AM

I haven't watched it in years - don't even remember when I watched last and I stopped caring about which movies or actors would win. The movies I watch normally don't get any fanfare at the Oscars. I only watched Little Miss Sunshine and Half-Nelson, the first getting a best pic nom and the latter getting a best actor nom. It would be cool if Ryan Gosling won.

n / February 22, 2007 9:52 AM

I'm watching, totally for the ridiculousness of it all and because it's a good use for the HD, but I get bored so I also have a bunch of busywork - filing etc. planned. And fancy drinks - should be a reasonable evening.

skafiend / February 22, 2007 9:55 AM

they do not sign my paychecks or contribute to my well being 3 they do nothing for society but take your time and money, your time would be better spent being with your family and friends rather

So you only read books by authors who contribute something to society or sign your paycheck, listen to albums by musicians who contribute something to society or pay you to listen? Not saying you're wrong, but there has to be SOME entertainment diversion you have that doesn't fall under your criteria. Or do you only endulge in cultural things that have an impact on society as a whole? Hey, I don't think the Oscars, etc. is a big deal or important either. And if I miss seeing it, I won't keel over and die. But it's a diversion that takes your mind of the real world for a little while. Don't worry, war, pestilence, famine, AIDS will still be there when the show's over...

WP Mike / February 22, 2007 10:05 AM

Ditto Dragonslayer. (And Kelly, please spread the word - and maybe do something nice & unexpected for your BF.)

Just earlier this week, I actually thought to myself, "I wonder who won an Oscar?" assuming I had already missed it. While I have a passing interest, the Oscars should learn from the Super Bowl and not delay any longer than two weeks past the Golden Globes... it's been so long now since most of these movies were in the theaters, I can't remember much about them (or find the energy to care).

anon / February 22, 2007 10:08 AM

Is this not the same question as the "Suberbowl Plans" earlier this month.

Appleby / February 22, 2007 10:44 AM

So, if you watch the Oscars, it's because you don't care about the war in Iraq? Or you don't care enough about it? What if you watch the Oscars while stuffing envelopes for your favorite politician's campaign, or while folding flyers for your civil disobedience campaign against the war? That doesn't change the Oscars. And it doesn't change you, either. If you cared, you cared before the Oscars were on tv, and if you didn't, well, you didn't.

Why are revolutionaries such Puritans sometimes? "Cast your dvd's into the fire and repent! While you are drinking cocktails, the flames of revolutionary justice are approaching your door! Repent ye sinners!"

Personally, I think the Oscars are boring, so I won't be watching.

Winediva / February 22, 2007 11:02 AM

Whats with all the Oscar hatin? I love the Oscars! I love the pagentry, the fashion, the suspense - all of it! In fact, I try to see as many of the nominated movies as I can before the big day. I still have to catch Dreamgirls, Little Children, and Notes on a Scandal.

I never realized there was so much disdain for the awards.

Felix / February 22, 2007 11:21 AM

As exciting and relevant as watching the election returns come in for the 3rd congressional district in Pennsylvania. Not that I begrudge anyone their entertainment by the show.

Although if one were to say about the Oscars something like "I love the pagentry, the fashion, the suspense - all of it!" then I'm sure that person was thrilled by the NBA All-Star Game in Las Vegas, yes?

carrie / February 22, 2007 11:48 AM

my prediction-

I will be at home, in my pjs with lots of wine, a few friends, pizza or thai food and we'll watch the Amazing Race. We'll then realize that the awards are on, realize we're out of wine, trek to the liquor store in pj's for more wine and then return home to watch the awards.

Bill V / February 22, 2007 12:27 PM

I just hope the Dixie Chicks aren't up for anything.

skafiend / February 22, 2007 12:31 PM

I just hope the Dixie Chicks aren't up for anything.

yeah, no offense, but I'm kinda sick of them. I'm sure that sounds bad, but geez, how long is that "fighting back" stuff gonna go on. The "ha ha" thing at the Grammy's had me wondering, Man, wasn't that whole "I'm ashamed of Bush" thing about four years ago? How long are they going to milk that?

I know, I'm insensitive...

leah / February 22, 2007 12:34 PM

oh snap, felix.

All you too cool for school kids just simmer down. Harping on people who find pleasure, guilty or not, in watching the Oscars need to find a new cause. It ain't that serious.

If the worst thing people are doing is enjoying a few hours of Hollywood whatever-you-want-to-call-it, then I think we're doing A-OK.

Go Jennifer Hudson!

To answer the question, I'll be at an Oscar party where I'll be rooting for whomever I selected on my ballot as the winner so I can win a prize.

Eamon / February 22, 2007 12:46 PM

Nope. I've never understood the Oscars. Art isn't supposed to be a contest, is it?

Lindsay / February 22, 2007 12:59 PM

I'll be taking tickets at the door of The Neo-Futurists. And yes -- this was a shameless reminder about our Oscar Night bash.

jj / February 22, 2007 1:04 PM

I'll be watching with some of my favorite gays... really, the only way one should experience Oscar night. I haven't seen most of the movies up for awards, but I like snacks and making fun of celebrities.

Caffeine Free / February 22, 2007 1:12 PM

I never intentionally watch it, but not surprisingly, I find myself parked in front of the t.v. on most Sunday nights.

Therefore, I will unknowingly stumble upon it and get sucked into commenting on how everyone looks and cringing over all of the incredibly awkward acceptance speeches.

Don't you feel weird when the orchestra cuts people off?

I'd say that I'm watching just to see Ellen, but it seems every host/hostess of the Oscars inevitably comes off not as funny or charming as they are on non-award shows.

Also, "Intervention" has been showing all repeats.

fluffy / February 22, 2007 1:27 PM

If there's nothing else on tv and there's nothing else to do.....maybe.
I don't find them exciting. I do love movies, though.

G.P. / February 22, 2007 2:04 PM

Appleby, Winediva - ditto. Well said.

Felix, Madachode, spook - thanks for supplying the usual Liberal Arts Student answer.

[cue sound of strumming violins.]

p / February 22, 2007 2:14 PM

i'll watch most of it. partly to see if i Beat Roger. also because i love the south side and jennifer hudson's Dreamgirls performance and will jump around like a raver and initiate a "the roof is on fire" call-and-response chant activity (with my mom) if she wins. also because i like movies alot. and also dropkick murphys should perform their song from The Departed, i'd like that. also- the emotion and honoring of cinema follows a natural progression of my frequent sunday activities of watching movies, thanking people and feeling shame. and i like speeches be they bad, amazing or amazingly mediocre. and the winners frequently upset me (i.e. Crash for best picture) and i like to ruminate on conspiracy theories regarding the oscars. i'd welcome any discussions which have the potential for usage of the phrase "velvet mafia" because i love to say "velvet mafia."

i hereby nominate and crown madachode for a gapersblockie in the category for.....Most Consistently Laughable Opinions (2006-2007). This honor was forecasted pretty early with his win last month at the People's DoucheBag Awards in the same category. Congrats on the Blockie!!

Rip / February 22, 2007 2:20 PM


Best Picture: Breaking Away

Best Actor: Dustin Hoffman, Kramer vs. Kramer

Best Actress: Jane Fonda, The China Syndrome

Actor in Supporting Role: Melvyn Douglas, Being There

Actress in Supporting Role: Jane Alexander, Kramer vs. Kramer

Best Director: Francis Coppola, Apocalypse Now

Wait a minute!! How long have I been asleep?

skafiend / February 22, 2007 2:36 PM

Wait a minute!! How long have I been asleep?

I think I saw you nod off right after the fake streaker ran behind David Niven...or was it when Sacheen Littlefeather walked off the stage and into obscurity?...

Spook / February 22, 2007 3:27 PM

Comparing TV to Books, wow
perhaps Mr.Skafiend can jump of the fence and
bring his above the fray, mainstream, middle of the road
I refuse to see the big picture, will not connect the dots
and join G.P with his general dourness
and together they can go do a tour in Iraq.
Maybe then will they understand the Chekhov tragicomicness of how America has by and large tuned our war with the help of TV
Or maybe just pick up a copy of the magazine Adbusters

Leelah / February 22, 2007 3:27 PM

Not watching. I don't see enough movies to find it interesting.

Sabrosa / February 22, 2007 3:34 PM


ken / February 22, 2007 3:53 PM

My prediction is -

I won't be watching due to the overwhelming boredom that television shows, especially award shows, gives me.

Wow / February 22, 2007 3:55 PM



Winediva / February 22, 2007 4:24 PM

Yes. I do enjoy the occasional "All Star" game, but I missed this year's version from the NBA. And I won't apologize` for that either. You will not squelch my fun.

Spook / February 22, 2007 4:31 PM

"Wow", don't be such a coward.....who are you? Its the internet already, no need to hide even more!
And come on........ say one logical negative thing about Adbusters! I tripple dog dare you! Its a great magazine!

skafiend / February 22, 2007 4:55 PM

Maybe then will they understand the Chekhov tragicomicness of how America has by and large tuned our war with the help of TV
Or maybe just pick up a copy of the magazine Adbusters

And perhaps you will pull that rather large insect out of your ass and realize that Chekov's tragicomedy is NOTHING compared to absurdity of someone who pisses on the comcept of television by using that font of consistently valuable information known as the INTERNET. Gimme a break...

isn't there something more productive you could be doing than wasting time posting here? There's a war on, you know...

P.S: Correct spelling helps get your point across much better. Not sure what "jump of the fence" really means.

skafiend / February 22, 2007 5:01 PM

on the CONCEPT of television by using that FOUNT of consistently valuable information...

practicing what one preaches is important

screen name / February 22, 2007 5:01 PM

um.... isn't "spook" a screen name that you hide behind? how is that different than "wow"?

skafiend / February 22, 2007 5:15 PM

um.... isn't "spook" a screen name that you hide behind? how is that different than "wow"?

Don't question Spook! It's hard being a hypocrite and a blowhard at the same time.

Besides, I'm sure he's somewhere feeding the homeless and beating off to a Marshall McLuhan poster.

I mean, he couldn't be wasting valuable philanthropic time surfing the internet, could he?...

Steve / February 22, 2007 8:43 PM

May watch after 10 pm or so, when the big awards come on. And, you know, after Galactica is over.

Prediction: Hollywood's long love affair with the Bush administration finally comes to an end, as that one person who makes movies serves the Bushies up but good!

paul / February 22, 2007 10:34 PM

I'm just hoping for "soy bomb" to make the jump from the grammys to the oscars.

Man that guy could dance!

kelly / February 22, 2007 10:40 PM

maybe Animal Channel will come up with a "Puppy Awards." Cutest puppy, best puppy ensemble, etc.

Spook / February 23, 2007 4:13 PM

Dear Scatfiend

I so idolize people who correct other's grammar/ lack of "correct spelling"
and then type "comcept" and "to absurdity of", etc, etc, etc. Perhaps you might want to borrow my spekk check as you're dear Spook has no time to correct any one's grammar/spelling- including that of my own- on this grand venue of ideas, thought, and information.

Of course had I only shallow arguments to contribute, perhaps I’d pretend I was worthy of a spelling b award. However dear sir, the fact that you butcher the English language in doing so, stands alone in its own ironic scat.

Happy Friday yall!

p.s I never attacked the concept of TV, not that logic means any thing for you dear Scat.

p.p.s Adbuster rules, but tonight dear friends….its all about beer and a few mixed drinks!



MT / February 23, 2007 4:43 PM

Best Picture: Children of Men

oh wait, it's not nominated for best picture.... they'll probably just give it to Babel instead... that shit's almost, if not more, convoluted and self-important than last year's Best Picture winner "Crass"...

skafiend / February 23, 2007 5:00 PM

Dear Speck,

I so idolize people who correct other's grammar/ lack of "correct spelling"
and then type "comcept" and "to absurdity of", etc, etc, etc.

and yet he ignores the fact that I immediately corrected it for clarity. Aw, you're so cute when you use your selective memory.

Of course had I only shallow arguments to contribute,

Aw, don't sell yourself short, Speck. That's ALL you have to contribute. Poo-pooing the comparison of TV and books in a blanket statement? Missing the point completely (while others understood right away)? Now that's what I call shallow and shortsighted! Way to go, Speck!

p.s I never attacked the concept of TV, not that logic means any thing for you dear Scat.

Didn't say you did, Speck. But keep making up points to arguments that don't exist. You're bound to be right once... that whole blind nut and squirrel concept.

However dear sir, the fact that you butcher the English language in doing so

Got an example?

Sleep well, Speck. Our stomachs are churning as we await your next missive. Or is that just gas? Hey, look! A copy of Adbuster!!!

Brian / February 25, 2007 2:06 AM

Hooray for GB flame wars! (And given the site's chosen theme, wouldn't Fuel flame wars be akin to the much fabled California Freeway Shootings?)

After having dated someone that watched Entertainment Tonight/ eXtra/ Insider/ et al. religiously, and hung on every move the celebrities made, I can say with great relief that not only will I not be watching the Oscars™, I won't even be picking up a Red Eye® on Monday to be bombarded by who won. I don't buy into the kind of celebrity-worship that my ex did. And frankly, it's out of control and their importance is blown way out of proportion.

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